The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You smell like a Billy Joel song
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
