He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
