Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize