you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize
