it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
