i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
this will be a night to untag.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
