i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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