i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
We have so much sex to catch up on
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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