Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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