and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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