Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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