Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize