i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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