I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
