Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
