seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We need to get me chipped asap
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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