is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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