Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize