Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
