don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
