you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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