Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
