Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
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Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
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Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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