Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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