wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize