You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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