If that was your dad, he is hot
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
