Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
