So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
