'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
