Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
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i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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