Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
