Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Your penis caused this!
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
