Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
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