Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
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