dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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