i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
My vagina just recognized that song.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?