First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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