how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
