how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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