btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I just want nice things and good sex
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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