its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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