Tell her she can't have a vagina
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
