i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
