It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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