I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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