so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
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