She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
