Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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