She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize