I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
