his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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